Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Evan Almighty!

Went for a quick movie at vivo with vennie chingyee gilda and joel who didn't watch but shopped. haha. IT's nice! Though it contains a few lame stuffs..haha

But i guess those who don't know the story of the Noah's Ark wouldn't understand as much as those who know. One of the part i remember is at the end where they show a dove with a fresh olive in its peak. It shows of God's covenant with Noah! Just like what it's shown in the movie, Noah was the ONLY faithful one who listened to God to build an ark despite the situation where an ark is completely unnecessary. It indeed proves of how God understands our situations much betta than we do. Perhaps sometimes things may look weird, feel weird and doesn't make sense. But actually, all it takes is the little faith of ours to believe that God is in control of ALL THINGS. Just like in the movie, evan wanted to give up believing that there'll be a flood...but God appeared just in time so that evan and his family, including the neighbours can be saved.

Another interesting point that i didn't realise is the part about how the building of the ark can be also a form of bonding and trust within Noah's family. According to Gen 6:13, God spoke only to Noah...i believe it takes alot of courage and believe for the family to believe in Noah and support his idea of building an ark. God was concerned about the whole family as well.

Many people would regard this story a myth or a legend...something that is impossible to happen. True enough we don't have sufficient proofs that are tangible now to say that it existed. (Or maybe there is already.) Whatever it is, God is indeed still and will be evident in the lives of many..those who are being called and CHOSEN. He's not any other God that we worship and thats it...He's one who talks to us, encourages us, rule us and live within us. Even that gentle touch of His will melt our heart and refresh us already...someone who's unavoidable, impossible to live without. :D

Monday, September 03, 2007

3 days of rest

What's the feeling of having lessons at 8am on 4 out of 5 school days? Ans:Bleah. :| Well, i think i will get used to it in no time. Haha

The past week had been rather hectic for me...for the fact that i got loads of tutorials to clear!!! Sleep only at 2+ 3 and wake up at 730...ha. So much so that my QT lasted for 10 mins only and day by day i can feel my strength being sucked. Lost and empty.

God's graciousness and faithfulness never fails...when i went for cell on friday, i could feel His presence recharging me...on sat and sun, He continued speaking to me and even used me for His work despite my lack of zeal. I was reading Exodus 5...the part about Moses and Aaron going to the Pharoah asking for 3 days break for the workers to go and hold a festival for God. Pharoah disagreed and even says that they were trying to find excuses to skive. After which Moses went to the Israelites to convey the Lord's message. However, the israelites did not want to listen to him due to the discouragements and harsh labour they received.

Upon pondering, i realise how we can be so like Pharoah where we denied God's invitation to worship Him due to the unending tasks on hand in life. Sometimes we 'postpone' our worship for Him where it should be a 24/7 thingy. Also, we could be like the
Israelites, having so much discouragements and disappointments in God in life that we just wouldn't want to listen to anyone whom God sent. Doesn't all these sound familiar? Friends who are going through period such as this? Personally i feel that everyone will have a pharoah period of time in life where we get so occupied with so many stuffs that we chuck God aside. Since I wouldn't want to be chucked aside by someone i love so dearly, I believe God will feel a million times more than i do.

I seriously cannot live without Him...He's my only source of strength and the reason to live, to study, to do tutorials!! If not i wouldn't work so so hard already..haha. Friends out there who aren't christian probably wouldn't understand what i mean...it's simply the drive for me to live my life well...the very reason why i even existed.

Right...gotta choing my tutorials already!!! :| Oh but the happy thing to look forward to is movie at vivo!! Evan Almighty! :)

Oh, just remembered, blk 5 really got loads of people with funny and unique laughter...haha!! I must record all of them down one day and make it my alarm ringtone. Haha!!! :P

Nite

Saturday, August 18, 2007

A river flowing against gravity?

Over the mountains and the seas, your river runs with LOVE for me.

Part of the song, I could sing of your love forever. Sang this song in cell today. Though i've been singing this for like the last how many decades (haha), i've never seen or imagine this image in my head before; a stream of river literally going through the sea and over the mountain, UP and down. UP! God gave this unrealistic yet real image. Speaks clearly of His Love despite situations...a gentle reminder that He's always there, and will never leave. Whenever we're thirsty, we can get a drink. Whenever we are tired, sit in the river and the current will carry you. Whenever you are tired, rest by the river and remember He's there to give you a pat. God seriously never fails...no one understand me better than He do. I didn't know how to tell my friends some issues i'm facing...hoping to get some wise advice...He came and spoke to me, PERSONALLY. Tremendous encounter. Who says you can only encounter God during great events?

Oh my gosh! Just when i'm typing this entry, my itunes played i could sing of your love forever by delirious! So unplanned man! I played Love Me by colin raye, next song was all the love in the world by the corrs and pop, goes the song! :D Double confirmation.

Anyway, i forgot to post this super duper cute photo of me and my roommate. Haha! Do we look like marios? Hee...



Cute? Ha! Good night!

Friday, August 17, 2007

Updates...

Life's full of challenges, i must say. Now that i'm more or less settled in my hostel, the next thing i gotta deal with is my self-discipline and time management! First 2 weeks of lessons don't have tutorials and labs...so timetable is super slack...which leads to late nights...hee. BUT, i'll definitely try to learn to manage my time well! :|



This is my dearest roommate! :) And we do stupid and fattening stuffs in our room!!! :P We eat like a pig, take photos like some idiots and scream most of the time! Haha. The funny thing is, we always bump each others' butt! Haha...oh it goes to show our room isnt very big. HA. Shall take some photos of my room when it's better furnished! :)

Some photos of us crazy-ing!



Do we look like we're in a tunnel? Haha!



Oh man...look at my extended chin...Haha! Don't bite me xiuwen!!!

All thanks to the wonderful creation of MACBOOK! :) Yea macbook rocks! Haha.

Right, gotta get prepared for lectures soon...it's gonna be that china lecturer! Though his accent is more or less gone, i don't quite understand what he's trying to convey! :| He make interesting calculus boring and difficult...never mind! I believe things will turn out betta in future! ;)

Shall post more soon! Cya guys! :)

Monday, July 16, 2007

Philippians 1

What can i say bout PAUL? He's really worthy to be called a faithful follower of God! Are we ready to say that to live is Christ? Is Christ really EVERYTHING to us? Our one aim and purpose is to glorify Him and not to achieve knowledge, pleasure, recognition and fame? To paul, to live is Christ, first, last, midst of ALL, and ALWAYS Christ.

Read this from by Dr. Henerietta C. Mears:
Christ is the giver of life-"I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
(John 10:10)
Christ is life itself-"I no longer live, but Christ lives in me." (Gal 2:20)
Christ is the model of my life-"Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is
perfect." (Matthew 5:48)
Christ is the aim of my life-"I desire to make known "the power and coming of our Lord Jesus
Christ." (2 Peter 1:16)
Christ is the reward of my life-"Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!"
(2 Corinthians 9:15)
I was just reflecting how for the past 19 years of my life, or rather, the past few months, to be easier, has my life been spent such that i could really say that when i live, its all for Christ. Many a times i stumble upon difficulties in life and i failed to be the doer of His word. I believe things would be made much simplier if we really focus on God and God alone every moment of our life. Recently i went to the CCC camp, this sentence really strike me and woke me up-"We're first a christian, then a student on earth." Something familiar to all, yet not practiced in our daily life. The truth is that when we are students, we strive for great results, excellence, recognition and friends' attention. Once in a while we got a fresh anointing from God and got "woken up" yet again to the fact that we are called first a christan than a student. If only we can really spend QUALITY time with God DAILY to receive that fresh anointing, we won't have to stumble as much in life. It's a great lesson learnt from Paul...how he always had joy in every of his circumstances...singing praises to God when jailed and tortured, praying for others when chained. Not only is he others-centered, he's really God-centered.
Paul says:
When i travel, it is on Christ's errands.
When i suffer, it is on Christ's service.
When i speak, the theme is Christ.
When i write, Christ fills my letters.
I believe when that one day comes, where all people on earth will live like how paul lived.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Past 1 month...

Right...i realised i haven't been blogging for more than a month? Haha.

The past 1 month was really eventful and fun! I worked in HIS connection, went to a GREAT church camp and a FUN Nus sports camp! :D

Church camp was AWESOME! :) Really had a great encounter with God and hear from Him personally. I was not only refreshed but renewed totally, ready to do His mighty works. Not only personal encounters did i find joy in, but also seeing my sec 1 girls being delivered and receiving the gift of tongues excited me even further! It was a great breakthrough, an encouragement to me, a lift from God Himself. Who says God is intangible? He can be if He wants to be!

Sports camp was another high high for me! The camp lasted for 6 days 5 nights with less than 20 hours of sleep in total, having to be under the sun most of the time when the sun is up. (Duh...) Haha. I tried almost everything that's called sports!! Windsurfing, dragonboating, air rifiling, rock climbing, banana boating, archery...blah blah blah. One of the memorable ones is banana boating! Due to time constraint, only 6 people in my group gets to try it and i'm one of the honoured ones!! :P We're really really good at balancing man...we didn't capsize at all, though the driver keeps steering to the left and right. Haha. I've made loads of friends out there...really great friends who will do all sorts of boliao stuffs and talk real, and i mean REAL nonsense man. Clubbing? Yeap, our finale night. It was at the guild house in NUS itself, al alumni club. Definitely my first. Being someone who's quite against the idea of clubbing, i really did had fun there. I would say it's decent. There wasn't dirty stuffs, guys rubbing on girls or cigarette smokes which will kill me instantly. We were merely dancing to the music and talking most of the time. Haha. But i will still reserve my stand towards such social activites, knowing that things out there aren't as simple as that.

During the camp, God spoke to me real clearly with this verse:

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. -Romans 12:2

It was a timely reminder for me to stand out and be different and to remember His will for me in my life.

Up next i'll be going for the campus crusade camp with yurong, my dear tungling friend. It's tomorrow! One cool thing is that we'll be staying in the Price George Park's residence which is deemed to be luxurious! :) I'll definitely come back with loads of stories to tell!

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

time bombs

What's the feeling of carrying many time bombs with you wherever you go? Especially for the fact that you don't know when is it going to explode and blast off! : I guess faith and trust play an important role here...maybe they weren't explode, they would be switched off and removed.

I've finally came to a decision! Nus, faculty of Science...here i come! :) Mixed feelings though. Very much prefer ntu lifestyle and system. Oh well, too bad nus provides what i want. The important thing is...i'm not taking any science course ok!! It'll math math MATH! :P

He said, "Go and tell this people:
" 'Be ever hearing, but never understanding;
be ever seeing, but never perceiving.' -Isaiah 6:9
A man's steps are directed by the LORD.
How then can anyone understand his own way?
It is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly
and only later to consider his vows. -Proverbs 20:24-25

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Updates...

What will you feel when u're in the bus, passing by the places where u've been, with different people at different times of your life with different reasons? Honestly, i feel...weird. :
I was in my friend's car, passed by one of the neighbourhood police post near PS and got reminded of several incidents.
The first time i went near there was when i lost my handphone and wallet, with my pink IC inside! Lost in the arcade, hurhur. I was 14 then, out with my secondary school friends to play daytona. I remember we were preparing to go for a concert at the indoor stadium...some chinese female singer, i've forgotten who. Anyway, we end up at the police station as my stuffs, put in my friend's bag, got stolen by some Malays(I'm so not being racist ah!). The story goes on that till now, my stuffs are not found and returned. Ha.
The second time was cause of my friend, reporting lost. I got reminded of my first incident, of course. Never forget.
The third time was when i "got lost" at town with my bball friends. It was when we saw that neighbourhood police post then we realised we were near PS. I remember it closed, i don't know why. Think was some occasion or something. Nevertheless, i wondered, you mean police actually stop working completely during public holidays? Not that they don't need rest la, but crimes still go on what. Right, perhaps i remembered it wrongly.
Three times...happened at different times of my life. The word change struck me so so much that day when i passed by that place again. How often will we stop by places we've been before when we were younger with memories stuck at the back of our memory bank "re-appearing" again? Time has been moving on so quickly that it passes just like that! Remember when we were in pre-u, sec schools, pri, kinder...? Now i truly feel the phrase, "Time flies". Not until you stop to think, you'll never realised your time has passed.

Flies flies flies....I'm still undecided with my choice of uni!!!! :( Although it won't make a BIG BIG difference whether i choose NTU or NUS in the end, the systems and env. will ultimately matters most!!! :'( I really want to say i'm feeling miserable but, i remember my friends out there who has yet to recieve any letters. Consoling words may sound fake but truly i would say, my friends, i believe there's a place specially for you. God will NOT forget about you. I'm praying...praying hard for an answer...

HOUGANG IS BLACKLISTED! Shucks...I've to be super extra careful wherever i go, whatever i do. Like cover myself totally and all? haha! Kidding...dengue is on the rise...bad bad. I'm praying, praying hard that God won't let it become an epidemic. Not so serious la huh...

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Love...what's that?

It's been almost 2 weeks since i blogged...why? Haha...just trying to clear up some thoughts and issues in life.

Well, i'm going to work at the student care centre near my house, full-time, for a month, starting next next week. I guess it'll be a place to really practice what i've learnt for the past many many years from the bible...like tolerance, patience, love, compassion... ... Nevertheless, i'm looking forward to many fun and interesting lessons from God! :) better than idling all day long, watching vcd, going out and spend $$ and playing games which are super wasting time.

Recently, the word love seems to be occupying my mind so much so that i feel nudged. I started thinking of the real meaning of love. What the world reckon it to be, what we feel, how we react to it, how we actually treat it. profound? I was trying to come up with my own definition to this word which the one of it is sacrifice. I feel the greatest love is sacrifice, God's sacrifice. How He sacrificed His son, He forgive us times and times again, help us with solutions, hear our complains, pick us up and give us a chance to try again, gave us freedom to choose and plan our life for us. Probably some will say this is nothing much since He is the one who created us hence He must bear with all these...like the aftermath of creating us. But He is a wise God! Of course He does know these consequences...yet because He loves us, He chose to give us life and chose to face all the sacrifices...His son, time, effort, sadness, unhappiness.... He has everything...everything. But He chose to put up with our nonsense and disobedience... What great love. I guess i need more time to understand this love. A love that changed my life, a love that made me so different and distinct, a love that give me the motivation and drive to carry on in life. How to describe love? I would say God. Love means God. Because God=love.

Talking about love...i really gotta get down to issues in my life that have been in my head for super long. In other words, prepare myself for the next phase of life that i'm about to face: University life. Hearing so many different comments from so many people around me, i start to wonder how will my uni life be... oh well, before thinking and daydreaming about it, i shall get down to reading through my TL notes again. To refresh my memory of what's learnt and to really get down to doing them. One of which is spiritual journaling...which wasn't successful since i stopped from my one and only entry. HAHA.

Alright...shall end with something interesting that happened today:
I had my usual bball training today and after that we went for supper. The table had 6 guys 2 girls. The topic was: girls can be 28 days not nice and 2 days nice. Haha. Interesting heh? Out of 6 guys, 2 attached, 1 married, 3 single.
One of the attached one, who is going to get married soon, said,"Woman complains like there's no tomorrow. They complain about work, family, stress, friends...blah blah blah. Though we try to come out with solutions to help them, they'll never accept and find all sorts of reasons to disagree with our help. When we don't talk about it, they'll think that we aren't concern about her. Women..."
The married one add on,"Well, through the experiences i get from my marriage, woman just want to complain. They want us to sympathise with them and agree with them. To hear them and console them. The only thing we can counter this problem is to ask them if all these complains help to resolve everything." (Yea i think that's a smart ans.)
The other attached one said,"Yes...they're bothered by so many stuffs that they keep talking about them. Only 2 out of 30 days will they be "normal"."

Agree? Haha...half half. I believe we girls do have our occasional mood swings and complains day. But not so bad what right...not like we'll complain to them everyday. At least we bother to voice out...not like some guys who choose to keep within themselves thinking that its a wiser move. Bleah. HAha!!! :P

Whatever it is...isn't it then the reason why sexual differences exist?! In any case, we're all different, so don't generalise! And i will learn not to too... :P

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Taiwan = FUN! :D

Food! Shopping! Cool weather! Fun! :) I guess the pictures explain them all!


This is the frozen banana coated with chocolate and hazelnut at one of the night market we visited. Taste perfect! :P


One of the background poster at the museum we went. So nice lah! :)


Tell me about this...i miss it! The original "ma la huo guo"! Hot and spicy pot! :)


The ferris wheel at taipei...real cool! My first time on it...can almost see the whole taipei!! And it cost only S$7 as compared to the S$30+ in s'pore.


We are right at the top of the mountain! The temp. is believed to be around 10-12 degrees! See my sister wrapped in towel! We completely didn't know it'll be that cold so we went up in t-shirts and 3 quarts... :(

Haha...this is funny! The entrance of the flower garden...because its pig year this year...haha.

Delicious cuttlefish freshly made! It's super fun trying them all! :)

The church we went to...and apparently the mother church is city harvest church in s'pore. Haha...so coincidental!

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Smiles

I've been giving tuition at HIS connection at Xinghua Primary School since the start of April. (HIS stands for Home-In-School, started by my church) And i can say its rather bad! It's been a long long time since i give tuition! Oh man...kids who are older are harder to control than the younger ones! (Completely opposite of what i thought.) I'm currently teaching P1 math and P4 Science. Sometimes it gets rather stressful, esp. when their test is round the corner. It feels like their future is in your hands and you gotta give your all, your best to make sure they do well. Ok, now i know how my teachers feel...

Well, sometimes i gotta agree that the kids can be rather inspiring too. Their child-like characters and how they don't hide and express themselves whenever they are happy, sad, jealous or angry. Their shy smiles always make my day and it feels like my heart is melting away. Their mischevious-ness would suddenly be erased away and i'll be completely nice to them. I guess God feels the same too. He can be mad at us for the disappointments and let downs we gave or the disobedient actions and thoughts and yet still love and forgive us because of the fact that we are His creation.

Nevertheless, i will still continue to try my best to have the kids under my control!!! hahaha! :P

Alright, its almost 3am in the morning and i'm still awake! Doesn't sound good...gotta wake up at 830am to catch my flight to taiwan at 12pm...so good night bye! :)

Conscience...

How incredible it is when God reveals us to ourselves through little things in life that usually go unnoticed by most. I was finding some songs in my windows media player library and came across this album called In God We Kill. In it was 2 songs which i'm totally foreign to. In a fit of anger i pressed the delete button, without bothering to ask my sisters if they were theirs. I stood still in front of my computer for a moment. Did this happen because of the love i have for God? Is it because of the fact that i dislike people playing around with His names? Yes...

How often do we stand up for Him, whenever people around try to mock His name or give Him nicknames. Every time? Sometimes? Never? Looking at some of the people around me, i know that there are still people who call themselves christian but never take pride in His name. I really wonder why can't they feel His presence...So near yet so far.

Some says its harder to be a christian than a free thinker, its easier to do wrong than to do good. I would say, ultimately its your conscience. Daily news on television and the papers is mostly on the bad things people do and therefore their consequences. Many a times i wonder how is it possible for these people to do such things when God gave each of us a conscience?! I can't help but say that satan can be so powerful that he blind the people so that they will walk towards the wrong destination and the people? Only to realise their mistake after each wrongdoing. Metaphorically, the blindfold that satan places on each of us is super duper big and thick. The only way to be in the light is God. God is like the torch with unlimited battery and volt power, able to shine through everything, even the satan's blindfold. Many a times we choose to close our eyes, such that we do not see the light. God gives us the power to decide whether or not to open our eyes and follow His light, or to do trial and error or follow our instincts that usually fail. Sad to say, many out there remain clueless till today. They have yet to learn the art of opening their eyes.

Faith. Trust. Love. Hope.

People may argue that sometimes even without opening their eyes, they manage to get away from doing bad or being in a bad shape. I would say, its God's grace. Inevitably, we could take God's grace for granted. We know how to give thanks, appreciate and cherish. But sometimes it may become so routined that the whole prayer slip from our heart to our mind. Say giving thanks for our food. At the end of the day, its the condition of our heart that matters.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

His Promises worth holding on

Thoughts running through my head. Things in the past flashed across my mind.

There is an endless song, echoes in my soul, I hear the music ring. And though the storms may come, I am holding on, To the rock I cling. I will lift my eyes, In the darkest night, For I know my Savior lives. And I will walk with You, Knowing You'll see me through, And sing the songs You give.

I could live life alone, And never fill the longings of my heart. The healing warmth of someone's arms. And I could live without dreams, And never know the thrill of what could be With every star so far and out of reach I could live without many things. And I could carry on, but...
I couldn't face my life tomorrow Without Your hope in my heart. I know I can't live a day without You Lord, there's no night and there's no morning. Without Your loving arms to hold me You're the heartbeat of all I do. I can't live a day without You.


Oh Lord You've searched me,You know my way; Even when I fail You,I know You love me.Your holy presence Surrounding me In every season. You go before me, You shield my way, Your hand upholds me. You tore the veil, You made a way. And when the earth fades, Falls from my eyes, And You stand before me, I know You love me.

At the cross I bow my knee, Where Your blood was shed for me, There's no greater love than this. You have overcome the grave, Your glory fills the highest place, What can separate me now?

How can I keep from singing Your praise? How can I ever say enough? How amazing is Your love? How can I keep from shouting Your name?

My chains are gone! I've been set free!! My God, my Savior has ransomed me! And like a flood His mercy reigns! Unending love, Amazing grace.

I know I am loved by the King. And it makes my heart want to sing.

The Lord has promised good to me. His word my hope secures! He will my shield and portion be, As long as life endures!


-Adapted from How Can i Keep from Singing?, Amazing Grace(My Chains are Gone) (Chris Tomlin), Can't Live a Day (Avalon), At the Cross (Hillsong).

Enlightenment

Sometimes i hate myself for doubting. Though i know the "correct answers", i seems to be doing another, or trying to find excuses and 1001 reasons to justify my thoughts. Yup, enlightened. Me keep asking questions like what's next, what's real, what's now...indeed a sign of doubt, not trust. I didn't realise that my faith was literally decreasing whenever i ask these questions.

Faith is believing that something will happen before that something really happen.

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
-Heb 11:1

Sunday service, though nothing very special happen except that Rev Derek Hong from Church of Our Saviour came, was impacting. I remember myself in tears like running waters. Why? The story goes like this:

I was feeling rather empty for the past 2 weeks, probably cause of the sudden "drop" from daily feeding to daily slacking. I was spiritually dry-er and dry-er each day. I know i had to keep up with the momentum from Tung Ling. But since i wasn't really working, my days grew slacker and slacker. I keep thinking that i will have a lot of time with God so i started doing things like watching korean dramas and meeting up with my friends. Ok, and thats a dip. I fall into the trap. Whenever these activities end, i'll be so tired and restless. My time with God grew lesser and lesser... God didn't give me up. He prompted me and i felt His nudge again. Last week, i spend more time with God, praying and worshipping, asking God for more of His anointing and presence. For more of His presence?? Isn't His presence always with us, in us, all around us? Yeap...it was till last sunday that i got reminded of how silly i was. God had and has and will always be with me, His very presence. I was waiting for the extraordinary experience, the moment for Him to tell me yeap i'm here with you. I was looking through a telescope to find him where He's actually right beside me.
He spoke to me, assured me, reminded me, forgave me, help me up, renewed me, refreshed me, restored me during the usual worship during the sunday service last week. :)

Ok, and i realise i need to read through my TL notes again...can't really remember some. Haha. Someone told me uni is starting in 2.5 months time. I couldn't believe it! That's really fast!!! : Mixed feelings...

Well, before i face the "reality", i shall go enjoy myself at TAIWAN for a week! Yes, i'm leaving for taiwan this thurs! Oh man, i can't wait! Finally i get to go for a vacation with my family! MY FAMILY! I remembered the last time travelling with my family was when i'm primary 5...yeap...that long ago. Haha...shall see the different side of the world and come back with stories to tell! :)

Today went Mind Cafe with my TL friends. Supposed to celebrate gab and rach's bday...but end up to be a get-together. Haha. In any case, it was really fun! There's so many many games there!!! Captivating! :D Though the food there aren't really impressive to me (yes i remember the brownie kinda taste more like a choco cake to me), I really enjoy my time there. It so not going to be my last time! Haha! Alright, gotta slp...nite! :)

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

What's real?

Just read rong's blog; talking about how we can think yet lack the ability to initiate change or do something with that thought so that it'll not go "unwasted". (Ok rong i agree never to post after reading other people's entries...haha! :P)

It kind of reflects me though. How i can have many many ideas and good thoughts in doing things for God, for others and sadly, they usually don't come to pass at all. :( I remember asking rong and asking God, "Why must i be someone who think and think yet do nothing about most of them." Well, i guess i really got to sit down and pen down stuffs that i really really wanna do and have that discipline to follow them. :S

A dog can show off to a cat by showing off its loud bark and sharp teeth. Yet when it meets with a tiger, the dog immediately turns timid and run away.
Two sides?
A teacher teaching his students not to lie and keep their promises. Yet when it comes to meeting his family or friends, he do otherwise.
Hypocrite?

I was just sms-ing one of my really great friend, saying how sometimes we know it but we don't do it EVERY TIME. Hmmm...that's why we are called sinners?
We know the law, the correct values, the rights and wrongs, the good and bad. But why are there still crimes? You mean crooks don't know what's conscience? You mean they're born evil? Who dare say they never lie before, or did something bad to someone, or have an evil thought esp. when they are angry.
I believe we're often blindfolded. Kept from the light, tempted by the evil. Strayed from the truth and heed for the dark Thinking that it'll be good to at least find a place to reside, hoping that one day we'll find an identity for ourselves. But i can boldly proclaim that thats a hope that will never come true. A hope not worth holding on.
What's real is the love, the belonging, the fact that we do not have to worry about tomorrow, next week, 10 years later-our future. A Father's love, The Father's Song.

The Father's Song (Matt Redman)
I have heard so many songs
Listened to a thousand tongues
But there is one
That sounds above them all
The Father's song
The Father's love
You sung it over me and for eternity
It's written on my heart

CHORUS:
Heaven's perfect melody
The Creator's symphony
You are singing over me
The Father's song
Heaven's perfect mystery
The king of love has sent for me
And now you're singing over me
The Father's song

(Ok, i shall try not to read other people's blog before i post my entry. Haha! :) )

Saturday, April 07, 2007

What's next?

Take me away to a faraway land.
I'll gladly elope with you,
to wherever you want and wish to go.
Whatever it is, take me,
for all i want is to be with you.
To a place where there's no one else,
a place where i can spend times with you and you alone.
Why can't there be just one kind of fruit?
Why must there be many different kinds,
With various taste and colour?
Why do they all attract different kinds of people?
Weird or unique?
There's no key to understanding one's heart.
Not to men, but God alone.
What's processing now,
5 mins ago,
yesterday,
last year,
a decade ago?
A guess with no answers.
It's a choice, really.
To believe that he will come and fetch me.
To elope with me and keep me from others.
It's your decision,
to think and evaluate only at the brighter region.
So, what's next?

Friday, April 06, 2007

Who Am I-Casting Crowns

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You're

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours I am Yours

Picture!

Yeah, finally! I know how to put photos in my post! Haha...all thanks to yurong! :P

Pictures of me with some of my tung ling classmates...aww...miss them. :(

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Am i up to IT?

Will i be able to take IT up and do IT well?
Will i fall and collapse where everything will come crushing over me
All the fingers will point at me.
All the eyes will stare and glare in my direction.
My heart will sink and i will ask,
"Why did i take IT when i'm unsure of IT's outcome?"
Challenge yes but what's going to happen next?
Will i be able to pick IT up from here?
Strength, passion, Wisdom.
My "friends" seems to have left me
Not for good, i know, but where are you guys when i needed all of you most?
I can't be a hero, i don't want to be.
I can't seem to hold on anymore.
My hands are slipping, perspiring and i can't grab the pole well enough so that i can hang in there.
A hand from above came, held on to me, TIGHTLY.
Gave me a chair below so that i can stand and not struggle.
Even if the chair isn't steady, i know i won't have to worry i'll fall.
For the hand that is holding on to mine is stronger than any other.
All i need to do is to let go, learn to let go.
Trust and let go.
As though a free fall, believe-that's the key.
But, the lock must face the key, so that the key may be able to fit into the lock hole
And turn IT, secure IT, save IT
The word help-is both worth rejoicing and worrying about -When help is given, or help is needed.
Where are you at this point in time?
Are you the one providing help or receiving help?
Are you the one needing help or the people around asking for help?
Or are you sitting at one corner and pray that everything will be still?
Face IT, get IT, dare to do IT, love IT, once again....

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Testify to love

Tung ling has come to an end. Yeap. Many asked if I'm much more "spiritual" than before. The answer that came to my mind is, "not really.", surprisely eh? Most people have the impression that TL is a place where you become more spiritual that after 3 months, your prayers become more powerful. Indeed there's no doubt that spiritually i've grown a lot. However i believe the one thing that changed me is where i've really had a life-changing encounter with the living God, which happens to be the theme/motto of TL. God showed me how messy my life was and still is. He made me realise the impossibilities of clearing up these messes without Him. Though till today i've yet to "tidy" myself up completely, i do believe in no time God will remove these impurities from me. TL had been a place where i learn to be humble, truthful and obedience. It's a place where i learn to put knowledge into practices. Being a Christian myself for years, i know that there are many truths and "correct ways" that i didn't follow. I didn't put what is right into practice, though i know certain things i do displease God. TL reminded me of the word OBEDIENCE. Easy to say, hard to deal with, difficult to follow.

Lecturers who left their footprints in our lives have indeed bring about a great impact. Inevitably, some lecturers have different views as us on certain topics. However, despite the differences, God still used them to give us His words in His own ways. Whether or not we share the same views as the lecturers, whether or not we agree with them regarding the things they said, God never fails to use them to impart His rema word to us DAILY. That's the power of God. I remember one of the last modules we had was on Cats and Dogs Theology. It teaches about how Christians can be self-centered or God-centered. However deep inside my heart i feel that the lecturer was too exaggerated with his claims and findings. They may exist but to me it's rare. thus for the 2 days, i completely didn't feel like listening to his teachings. But, amazingly, God spoke to me through this phrase that he kept emphasising on,"Above all, glorify God in ALL things." He was saying how we must be a dog christian where our life must be God-centered and followed by that phrase. Something that i knew eversince don't know how many years ago. It was no coincident...this phrase reminded me of the fact that i did not fulfill it in ALL things in my life. Without this phrase that was highly emphasised in his lectures, i wouldn't have come to realise the fact that didn't obey Him completely. Isn't it amazing how God is so evident in our lives? Through things we loathe, people we can't accept and situations that are unbearable, God never fails to teach us. What great mercy and love. Indeed, unending love, amazing grace.

To the lecturers who have taught me His words and impacted me in one way or another: Thank you for your faithfulness, passion to impart and interest in God's heart. Indeed I am so blessed to receive and be fed. Your lives, experiences, testimonies have motivated me to persevere on even as i continue to carry the cross in my life. Your obedience in taking the step of faith to obey God's calling to your lives to teach. The sacrifices you've made and the road of sufferings marked the very promise of God. I will say that these hardships you guys went through will not go to waste...rather they have turned into motivation and truth that i can hold on to, especially during the times of difficulties. :)

To the Dean, Ju: Your love and passion to serve impressed me. Wonderful and mighty woman of God. You sacrificed your time for me, took care of me spiritually and emotionally, prayed for me and talked to me when i needed help. No doubt you are the candle with strong yet gentle fire. You lit up my candle, every time my flame ceased, you will come by immediately to relit my flame. Your continuous support and unfailing love to me really protrays God's love and care. My role-model, my support, my adivisor/teacher, my friend, thank you. :)

To my cell, Jabok: Lynn, my buddy, thank you for never failing to point out my mistakes so that i can change for the better. Thank you for encouraging me and giving me more confidence in myself. You've made me realise the fact that there're many different perspectives to each issues in life so that i won't be blinded or "biased" where misunderstandings can surface. The companionship you've provided, the patience you've displayed and the inputs in my life...i'll never forget. Indeed you are one person whom i'm comfortable with to share my problems, happiness. You put up with my lame jokes and sudden emotional/sensitive times. I promise that even as you're going to UK to study, i'll be praying for you and i'll continue to share with you. My wish is that we'll be a great buddy/support to each other, that we'll grow together till as long as God allows. :) Jolene, your cheerfulness makes my day. How you're constantly excited and interested in every lessons spurs me on to be interested as well. You never fail to say the right word at the right time, do the right thing at the right time. Indeed i've learnt many things from you. Thank you so so much. :) Yurong, yes, i'm the first to talk to you in TL. Haha. Though i confess i didn't have a good impression of you intially, as days pass, i realise how alike we can be at times...our clumsiness, emo-iness and the values in life we have. Your passion to serve in your church, to lead the whole worship and bring them to greater heights and your interest in knowing God more taught me a lot. Your bubbly-ness and easy-going character make me feel really comfortable being around with you. I enjoyed the times we bake, talk, cry, pray, sleep, get cranky together and the craziest things men would ever think of. Haha. Really want to thank you for making life in TL much more interesting. :) Eunice, my twinnies! It's really amazing how we can be similar at times, really freaks me out sometimes. Haha. Nevertheless i enjoy your company. Your bubbly character and the times where we go crazy together...really enjoy it. Weird things we do together and stupid things we laugh and talk about. Haha...thank you for making life in TL more worthwhile. :) Lynette, wonderful girl who plays the bass so fantastically! Your gentleness and ability to know when to take a step back taught me a lot. Thank you so so much! :) Bernice, you're so open and frank! You never hide things from us, your openess and friendliness impressed me greatly. Indeed i would say its a gift from God to you. I enjoy the times where we laugh together, shop and watch movie. Haha. Thank you so much for leaving your prints in my life. :) Rachel, i love your voice! Haha...i can remember taking super candid and "bright" photos of you and you taking me. Haha. One smart girl that i know. Thank you for entertaining me when i'm so bored, enduring the nonsense i have during class time. Haha. My schizophrenic partner! Thanks! :) Charity, i really got to know you more during the mission trip where we bunk together. You're always so interested in God's words and ways in people life. Your goal to strike a balance in everything you do reminded me of the times where i can go almost "one-sided". Someone whom i'm with for 2 years, so near yet so far, we didn't know each other till TL. Indeed i believe its God's very plan for us to know each other! :) Salome, yeah we share the same interest in Math! Your love for people around you, always trying to make sure no one is life out, giving your love to the people around you, as much as you can. The sacrifices you made taught me to be less self-centered. The care you gave and every single effort in making everyone happy impacted me. Thanks! cya at NTU if possible! :) Joan, your dariness to be yourself. Your passion to run after goals in your life. Your never ending endurance and perseverance...thank you for being yourself, you've indeed taught me a lot, in being the true me. Thanks! :) Above all, thanks to everyone who imapcted me in one way or another, the support and encouragement you gave, the companionship and love. :)

To Nicolas: Thank you for covering me during worship practice. Despite my lousiness with the keyboard, you never fail to encourage and affirm me. You taught me patiently and didn't complain about my lousiness. Your deep knowledge if the bible spurs me on too, to know Him better. I enjoy the talks we had, even as we shared about our lives, i can see God in your life, how you always put God first and you hold on tightly to His words where you overcame many obstacles in the past. Thank you! :)

To Benji: Thanks for always laughing at me ah... Haha. I really enjoy talking to you...your replies are always so unexpected. Your jokes, which i didn't understand most of them, are rather entertaining. I will never forget the way you cycle and make fun of people! Haha...indeed a joy to my heart. Thank you! :)

To JJ: I really see your passion in worship and your seriousness when it comes to Christianity. I can see that you are really super on fire for God. Indeed you have taught me to keep focus on God and to be consecrated for Him at all times. Never forgetting your lame comments and jokes...always so sudden yet predictable. Haha. You "became like us" so that we can communicate. You came out of your comfort zone to interact, learn and impart. Even as you're going for SOL, i pray that God will reveal Himself to you and increase your capability so that you can have a greater capacity for a larger territory God has in stored for you. :)

To weiye: I'm so so impressed and proud of your faithfulness and obedience in making an important decision to be a missionary for God in China! God will indeed honour you and provide for you! Even at such a young age, i pray that many lives will be saved through you and that you'll never be led astray for His grace is upon you! :)

To leroy: Thanks for your companionship when going home. You taught me a lot with regards to being patient in everything and in anything, give thanks and me contented. Thank you. Indeed you're another person who reflected the passion to serve and lead. I pray that God will continue to give you strength and wisdom! :)

To josephine: Testify to love! :) ;)

Many many more...gabriel, rajwin, uncle chris, caroline, stephanie, weber, cherilyn, uncle victor....too many to mention...to rest of the class: Thanks for being yourselves, being so caring and affectionate in everything you do. Your faithfulness and love for God. Thanks for all the fun too! :)

Last but not least, to the Almighty God: Thank you for

honouring my obedience in going TL,
the people you have placed in my life,
the lessons taught even through little little things,
the love you showered upon me,
not giving me up,
pulling me up when i fall,
carry me when i'm tired,
find me when i'm lost,
forgive me even when i let you down,
embracing me when i'm down,
giving me the peace when i'm scared,
hug me when i feel alone...

Thank you. :)

My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God my saviour has ransomed me
And like a flood
His mercy reigns
Unending love, Amazing grace

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

It's coming to an end

Tung Ling is coming to an end...sad...:'( Well, to be frank, i have mixed feelings about it. For the past 12 weeks, i've been fed with many knowledge and information that i feel like i've over-eaten and i'm going to "vomit"! And of course finishing TL would mean a good time for me to digest what's taught. Yet i feel rather reluctant to leave my classmates, a really great bunch of people. People who joke as though there's no tomorrow, people who loves to sleep in class, people who are just so intelligent and brilliant, people whose laughter are so so contagious, people who go crazy at the wrong time....many many many different interesting character. Indeed it is one of the most enjoyable class i ever had in my entire life...

I can't imagine myself on a weekday without having to go to school and without morning worship and prayer and devotion. Will i still "survive"? Will i be able to do these on my own, daily, so that i can always stay focus on God for that day? Nicolas was asking me what would i do next monday(which is the first day that i do not need to go for school)...It really struck me. I can imagine the worldly pleasures that will tempt me and draw me away from God. I need to be consecrated for Him at all times. However these are head knowledge isn't it? Many will know about this and will place this truth in their heart, as a daily reminder of our purpose on earth. But sometimes its just so hard to put these into practice DAILY...everyday! There are times when you wake up late and rush to for an appointment that you forget to have a good quiet moment with Him to hear His directions for the day and..... Perhaps it applies to people like me. Nevertheless i will never give up trying and will give my best to glorify Him in whichever area that He called me to.

Good Night. :)

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Operation in progress...

It has been a week of fun, laughter and jokes. I spent most of my time with my friends, those of whom i haven't been seeing for a super long time. Every night was a late night for me. I reached home, on average, at 12. It was cool, of course...spending time with friends, catching up, talking and laughing together. However in the midst of these joy, or rather after every "dates", i didn't feel happy or satisfied. I didn't had that feeling of-"Yea! Its a good time spent!" I ended my days with tiredness and no smile. I didn't know why...i thought it was because i'm physically tired. Even for the lessons in TLBC the whole week, i didn't pay much attention. (oops..) Something's blocking my mind. There seems to be obstacles in my life thats preventing me from moving on. Even for the worship on friday night during cell zonal meeting, i couldn't see out the lyrics:

Forever God is faithful
Forever God is strong
Forever God is with us
Forever
Though i'm having loads of fun out there, it seems like there's an emptiness in me. Some "hole in my heart" that all these joy cannot fill. If i'm not wrong, this is one of the weeks i spent for the past few years which i laughed the most. Immediately, i could sense a "dryness" in my life. I know i'm steering away...i couldn't find a goal in my life. I couldn't see the need of reading the bible. I couldn't see where i was going. It's as though i've lost my way in the forest, every time when there's a turn, i'll be glad. But after that i'll be like sad again as there isn't light nor paths that i could follow. I'm straying away...
Suddenly i feel as though i'm not fit to be a leader in church. I couldn't bring myself to teach my sec 1 girls. I feel as though there's nothing i can impart. My life is in a mess! The things that i taught them and the things that i advise my friends about, i'm completely not doing it! I was so down...though in my heart i'm praying that God will help me to get my life straight, i know i'm not making an effort myself. Quiet time everyday lasted only 5 mins. Spiritually i know i'm dry...the flame in me ceased. The thing is that in my heart, my desire is to know more about God, to read His word so that i can teach and impart and to be more like Him, yet i'm not doing them.
On sunday, which is today, i slept till 1145am! I missed both services in church. I was sad, disappointed and feeling uneasy as for the past how many years, i've never missed a single service unless i got something important on. Thus for the next half an hour, my mind was filled with all the why-s...i was thinking, "I need a change! I need to go to church! I need God to renew me and refresh me! I need the anointing again! But God, why didn't you allow me? I didn't sleep very late last night! Why WHy WHY!" :'(
After my mom left house for church, a prompting came over me. It feels as though God wants to tell me something but i can't hear it. Then i went to eat my cereals and watched tv for a while as i was waiting for my friend to collect his stuffs. Right after, i went to the piano, thinking that it has been a long time since i played it, i played the song . As i sing along, i started tearing...it was the Holy Spirit. It was the very visitation of God's presence in my life once again. For the past week, i've been lacking this embrace from God, this covering, the very shadow of God's wings. I realised His reasons for not letting me to go for church services. He knew that if i have gone for it, i would stayed out the whole day with my friends. He wanted me to meet Him. He wanted that time alone with Him. He has been waiting at the mountian for me...i have been letting Him down. I started praying and crying...i felt helpless...i felt like there's no meaning to life. But God came, He gave me a chance, a way, a light. Despite my disobedience, my unfaithfulness, my unloving actions to Him, He picked me up. And the very reason is simply because He loves me. He didn't want me to be led astray, He didn't want me to leave Him. After reflecting, i realised how God has been nudging me to go back to Him yet i disobeyed and procrastinated. He sent people and dreams and experiences to me but i ignored. I was completely oblivious to His calling, His presence, His love.
Though i had a great time feeling refreshed and renewed, knowing that God brought me back, i can start afresh,in my heart i know that this is not all. I've yet to go back to God immediately. It wasn't a once off thing...i know i need to do my part as well, to set aside time for Him DAILY. I need to be fed spiritually, I need Him so that i can continue on with life. I need His directions, instructions, presence. It really brought me to learn something new. True enough God is so divine and great that NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM. However there are times where God will help you up but not pull you along. He wants me to walk by myself, to run after Him. He wants me to love Him as well, not just Him loving me. Definitely He'll provide me with strength, He wants my best. I believe thats the part of living our life to the fullest. Not just finding for opportunites to evangelise, but time with Him for i know ultimately its the heart that matters. It's not only how many souls you save, how many As you get, how popular and famous you are on earth that God sees. It's also the heart, the attitude that we have towards the things He wants us to do.
I thank god for forgiving me, for not letting me go, for pulling me up, for providing a way. Indeed I can sing of His faithfulness now and forever. This incident taught me a great lesson. It's something that i really considered a turning point that i would never want to forget. The feeling of it is like a child lost in a shopping mall. Though there are many interesting toy shops to see, the child is still alone. He's just purely wandering around with no one beside, no one to lead him. I pray that I won't be that child anymore. I don't want to get lost. I want to stay by His side forever...and ever. I thank you oh God, my saviour, my friend. :)

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Oh my, it has been more than a week since i blogged! :P Sad to say, i was rather busy over the week with the stupid essays and personal statement that i got to write for my scholarship and university application! It's pure troublesome. Pure, "pure". I'm so reluctant to sign up for scholarships!! Tedious work, plus no gaurantee. Oh well, since everyone else is telling me to do so, i'll persevere on and finish it, hopefully i can get a scholarship that pays for my tuition fees and hostel fees!! :) :) :)

I spent quite a few days thinking about the outcome of the A Level results. When there's someone taking an A, there's bound to be another at the other extreme end. Somehow not everyone can be pleased and be satisfied altogether. Sometimes i wonder; is that few alphabets on the piece of paper really so important? The power of it, making someone over the moon and for some, crying their hearts off.


Now a hurdle over, comes another; university life. Time really flies...i totally agree. It feels like i last year i was still in secondary school! Sometimes there'll be this reluctance in me to enter into the adult world. How i wish i can be 16 all over again...bleah. Well, on the other hand i'm looking forward to the fun i can have in uni! I believe it'll be a whole new experience that God has prepared specially for me! :)

Ok, before that, gotta settle the applications. Oh man....its disgusting...ok. Time to continue slogging..... :(

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Hope for the future

A cup filled with water, overflowing. It's far too small to contain anymore. The only solution is to pour away some, so that it'll not be suffocated. How bout changing the shape of the cup? Adding more material so that it'll be able to increase it's capacity for what's coming in. But it's not an immediate solution...it takes time. Right now the only way to solve this problem is to discard some of its contents, let it breathe and rest while it gets ready for another "operation".

The illustration completely describes my situation now. True enough TLBC has been amazing and enjoyable for me. But, it seems like there's too many information and facts for me to digest and contain. I feel overloaded. Just like when there's a heavy object on the weighing machine, the plate of the machine will sink it's way down. Exactly. Yup, every modules have opened my eyes towards the work of God's hands that i never knew. But the passion and joy of unveiling every mystery in the bible seems to be diminishing. And so, i decided to take a little break. Have a good rest at home and not think about what's taught in school. A good little retreat and talk with God.

Obviously that doesn't mean i shut off completely from what's taught. Still absorbing but at a smaller capacity. This very interesting fact that i came to know is in the book of Romans, Paul actually said that because of the Jews' transgression that results in the salvation of the Gentiles, which is us! And thus we may be called into Israel and we're the children of the promise. All thanks to Israel! :) Another one. The end times would be determined according to the state of Israel. Like who's the authority and all. That's because Israel is the land that God blessed. A covenant God had with Abraham. A promise and hope that all of us can hold on to. A future, though it may seems a little hard to visualise right now. How about this. I remember Pastor Benny telling us about his research on the country Israel. Israel was and still is enjoying great wealth. Companies like haagen daz and happy co. (ben & Jerry) belongs to them too! Though they are a US or UK brand, the company belongs to Israel. Amazing? It's this pleasure of seeing God's word getting more and more vivid and real that kept me "alive".

Many people out there are trying to prove the bible wrong by sending their best archeologists and researchers all over the world. Why not prove the bible right? There's more satisfaction when all that's in the bible become so alive right in front of our eyes that we can say BINGO! :D

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Oh no!

Pastor Benny Ho taught us on the book of Romans 1-8 last week! It was super good!! Oh man...one of my favourite speaker. :) The way and things he speaks about are so engaging and applicable! :)

Well, we're having Pastor Joel Baker right now. He taught us conflict resolutions and spiritual authority for the past 2 days and for the next 3 days, he's going to speak on JEWISH ROOTS! So exciting! I really really can't wait for the passover dinner that we're going to have this thursday! Oh but the anti-climax is...i'm getting my A level results this friday...

Boo. I don't think i can really enjoy thursday night and friday morning. My mind would be filled with all the alaphabets and the face of my teachers! Though i always tell the others that God's divine presence and peace will cover and overwhelm us in all other areas, it's just so hard to really do it! Easier said than done. What a real test of faith and trust. Indeed i'll fear not, for i know i prayer and have done my best. So...all the best to all A level students out there! May we be glad for whatever results we'll be getting! :)

Sunday, February 25, 2007

1000 marbles

I came across this story that really speaks so truthfully about our life on net.(http://www.christianlifestories.com/stories/m-r/marbles.html)Really got me to think and reflect. The word is REFLECT.


The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings. Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.

A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the kitchen with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it. I turned the volume up on my radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning talk show. I heard an older sounding chap with a golden voice. You know the kind, he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business himself.

He was talking about "a thousand marbles" to someone named "Tom." I was intrigued and sat down to listen to what he had to say. "Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. Too bad you missed your daughter's dance recital."

He continued, "Let me tell you something Tom, something that has helped me keep a good perspective on my own priorities."

And that's when he began to explain his theory of a "thousand marbles."

"You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years."

"Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900 which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now stick with me Tom, I'm getting to the important part."

"It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail," he went on, "and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays. I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy."

"So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round-up 1000 marbles.

I took them home and put them inside of a large, clear plastic container right here in my workshop next to the radio. Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away." "I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life. There is nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight."

"Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure if I make it until next Saturday then God has blessed me with a little extra time to be with my loved ones...

"It was nice to talk to you Tom, I hope you spend more time with your loved ones, and I hope to meet you again someday. Have a good morning!"

You could have heard a pin drop when he finished. Even the show's moderator didn't have anything to say for a few moments. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to do some work that morning, then go to the gym. Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. "C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast."

"What brought this on?" she asked with a smile. "Oh, nothing special," I said. " It has just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. Hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out? I need to buy some marbles."


What then is our purpose in life? What's the whole meaning in living on earth. How much time have we wasted? Time that could have save someone and to have eternal life. Time that could have been spent on something more constructive, more fruitful. Time with God.

:|

Joy
Smiles
Cheers
Happiness
Laughter
Enjoyment
Peaceful
Quiet

Lonely
Dull
Sensitive
Emotional
Jaded
Fatigue
Tears
Unhappiness
Questions...without answers
Inspirations
Answers
Repentence
Discover
Ascertain
Rejoice
Thankful
Joy
Smiles
Cheers
Happiness
Laughter
Enjoyment
Peaceful
Quiet

Lonely
Dull
Sensitive
Emotional
Jaded
Fatigue
Tears
Unhappiness
Questions...without answers
Inspirations
Answers
Repentence
Discover
Ascertain
Rejoice
Thankful
And the list continues...

Isn't life usually like this? It's a cycle of ups and downs. Repetitive, tedious and troublesome yet interesting and beneficial. Oxymoron? :

And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. -Romans 5:2b-5

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. -James 1:2-4

Monday, February 19, 2007

Just Let Me Say

Terrific song that i came across in Tung Ling when i was on duty for the keyboard. Worship led by benjamin, otherwise known as benji boy, who is so well-loved by the girls in TLBC. (Haha! :P) The lyrics is good, so is the song. :)

Just Let Me Say
Just let me say
how much I love You
Let me speak of
Your mercy and grace
Just let me live in the shadow of Your beauty
Let me see you face to face
And the earth will shake
As Your Word goes forth
The heavens can tremble and fall
But let me say
how much I love You
O my Saviour, my Lord and Friend.

Just let me hear
Your finest whispers
As you gently call my name
And let me see
Your power and Your glory
Let me feel Your Spirit's flame
Let me find You in the desert
'Til this sand is holy ground
And I am found completely surrendered
To You, my Lord and Friend

So let me say
How much I love You
With all my heart I long for You
For I am caught in this passion of knowing
This endless love I've found in You
And the depth of grace, the forgiveness found
To be called a child of God
Just makes me say
How much I love You
O my Saviour, my Lord and Friend
Just makes me say
how much I love You
O my Saviour, my Lord and Friend