Well, ever since i applied and got accepted to Tung Ling Bible College, i really thought it would be best for me not to think of stuffs alog that line. Moreover my my aim and hope is to really go one step further in my walk with God and my spiritual life. People around me are thinking of and discussing about bfs and gfs...well, especially my non-christian friends. Sometimes it might be just so hard for them to really understand why i chose not to think of these. To them, i'm being holy. But the truth is, i believe there is more in life that one should consider, not just finishing a human's routine; studying, going into relationships, getting settled with kids, grow old and die. The very question that constantly rings in my mind is: Is that all in life? Many people would think christianity is just yet another religion accepted in Singapore...practiced by many, especially the "holy ones". Well, to me, the exact explanation i would give is that being a christian, i chose to go back to the One who made me, who first loved me, to know more about Him and to have an intimate relationship with Him. Sounds holy? Nah...it's the theology of a father and child...
Well, many asked why i want to go Tung Ling instead of working...i said, "i CHOOSE to offer God my time before i do anything else." It was a hard decision for me too...it would mean a lot of sacrifices especially on the financial part(since i'm paying the fee myself).
One of the things that left me with a deep impression on the first day of school in Tung Ling last friday was that there is to be no bgr in this 3 months. (though it may sound strict, it is definite necessary to cut off distractions) It is one of my desires (or should i say dream? want? goal? whatever..) in life to have a really good partner...one can give me spiritual support especially. Many a times i pray and ask God what exactly does He has in store for me. No answer...haha! I must admit that sometimes it turns into a kind of worry or just something that will distract me from other things. God replied me in another form during the devotion i had at Tung Ling last friday. He spoke to me in this verse:
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:33-34)
I was thrilled, of course. Haha! (well, though i know the root meaning of this verse does not exactly fit the problem i'm having, i believed since God showed me this verse at this time, He would have His reasons to it) but after much thought and conviction, i believe He has called me to Tung Ling for a reason, a good one. As of now, i choose to obey Him, to cut away all these relationship stuffs for now...to hunger for Him.
I believe God is teaching me patience, trust and faith. Most of all, He's teaching me about His love for us, in a way that i never knew as a christian since i was born, so that i may learn to love everyone in my life the way He loved me.
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